Dont Quit
I wanted to take a moment to share some thoughts and feelings from my own life, and my perspective on those things. Warning: this is a long post. I will not fault you for choosing not to read it. For those that do, feel free to come back with questions, comments, or criticisms.
Lately I find myself in situations where I'm a "white belt," or a "newbie." I will do things that come natural and it turns out that wasn't the right thing to do. Happens to me all the time in BJJ, in just about any position. Happens in different stand up styles that do not use triangle- based footwork. I also hear people say things when we are training that I disagree with, or I do not believe in. Like the guy that told me wrist- locks are "cheap" in BJJ, and I'm happy to take them in a stand up battle.
When I train in anything outside of Inayan Eskrima, I'm the new guy, and that's OK. It's OK that I struggle. That's how anyone gets better... by going through the struggle. The key is to have fun every now and again. Play. Enjoy it. Yes, it's something new or different so there may be bumps in the road. Get up. Get moving. Get over those bumps. That's the path to getting better. The struggle... how to keep going. For me, it starts with the things I say.
Suro Jason Inay taught me long ago that the words we speak have power, even unto ourselves. If I say, "I am terrible I just fed my brain a statement that I am terrible. My brain hears that, processes it, stores it, and it can come back out in my actions later. Goes back to that old saying, "Garbage in, garbage out." Rather, if I say, "I have an opportunity to improve <insert anything here>," then I fed my brain something positive... or at least, not negative. The brain hears that there is an opportunity, and has the option to respond, "challenge accepted!" You hear your own words. Use them wisely.
The next step I take in overcoming the struggle is something I already mentioned, play. Have fun in training. At least for a few moments, so that even if the majority of the class was a struggle, there are those fun, smiling moments that shine through. Hold onto those. My instructor Mr. Peter Sorce, says that each student's likelihood of returning to another class is heavily influenced by the experience they had during the last class they attended. Therefore the instructors that Mr. Sorce trains are taught to help students have those eureka moments, those huge smile, I nailed that technique moments. As a student, I too have a responsibility to seek those. If my mindset is focused on enjoying my time in class, I'm more likely to have those moments.
So... have I ever thought of quitting? Sure. All the time. For a while it was after every non- Inayan class. I wasn't feeding my brain positive statements. I wasn't trying to enjoy my time in class. I was doing the opposite of what I was taught to do, and my words, attitude, and actions reflected that. Any time someone feeds himself or herself garbage and they stay focused on their failures, the mind goes to quitting. How do you get past that and start having fun again? For me, it came down to a conversation I had with my son William. "Did you have fun in class today?" he asked. "No. Not at all," I replied. William looked at me, "Are you going to quit, then?" I responded, "No, William. As much as I hate having trouble, as much as I hate feeling like I'm not making any progress, I hate quitting even more." Quitting is not an option. Keep pushing forward. Stay positive, even when it's tough. Have fun, even when it's new or different, or difficult. Talk with someone about how you're feeling and what you're going through. You'd be surprised how people have felt the same way, or have gone through the same thing, and they'll be happy to tell you. So stay the course. After a while you'll be able to look back, and see just how far you've actually traveled, and look forward to the path ahead.
So smile. Have fun, and enjoy your time at Mr. Strickland’s. Now if you'll excuse me... I need to go practice what I preach. Mr. Allen Roholt