Cycles of students
Recently, at another school, a group of instructors were discussing difficulties with a student “just not getting it”. The kid is talented, flexible, and quick to grasp forms. But, socially, he is kind of a pain to have in class. At testing, tournaments and camps, he is the most likely to do something inappropriate to embarrass himself or the school. All instructors know someone like that. Experienced school owners and instructors know students like Drew Cain.
Drew WAS that kid. He has since grown into a responsible young adult (became an instructor, went to college and got married) that I am proud to work with at the school and proud to have up front teaching juniors and adults. Students develop. The reason I write about former students is because that is what helps me teach current students. I had a little girl put on her sparring gear not long ago and say, “He’s not going to hurt me, right”? --That’s a girl who was riding the water jet skis at the lake, and had people’s lives in her hands! I saw a girl NOT breaking, but we finally got the concept into her head --She later ran two different schools for weeks at a time, and didn’t lose at a tournament for three years in a row. I’ve seen a girl afraid to come to class without her brother --That’s a girl who went off to college and just graduated from NYU!
For our “Just not getting it” kid, I simply brought up to the other instructors “Drew Cain”. Light bulbs went off over their heads. If that kid sticks with it, he’ll be just fine. We have the experience and the precedents to make sure that can happen. I recently read a blog Mr. Strickland put out about parents working with their kids to “Not let them quit”. Obviously, I’ve been doing this for 20 years as a volunteer, and both of my boys stuck with martial arts throughout their high school years, so I value the training, the camaraderie, the skills, and the mental value of martial arts training. Nevertheless, I always worry about it when school owners tell us how parents shouldn’t “let” the kids quit. In less successful schools, you always have to question if that is a financial ploy. In successful, vibrant schools such as the ones I am fortunate enough to teach in, there is a very different reason. I have a friend/training partner who is a single parent, having lost a spouse to cancer. His child has struggled with that, obviously. That child isn’t particularly coordinated, not particularly inspiring in class, a little overweight, and has decided after a couple years that it is time to quit. What quitting means is that the kid won’t get the physical opportunities, the self-confidence boost, the discipline and the structure which martial arts does indeed provide. It means that a group of 10+ adult instructors who care about the student, and who are trained to help develop exactly those traits will not have the opportunity to impact the student in a positive way. It means that a single parent will have to shoulder more of the load in helping with all aspects of the child’s life, while maintaining a parental responsibility as well. It is quite a load to carry, and he is a friend that we won’t be able to help much with it now.
Every family has to make their own decisions about activities they will support. For the instructor crew here at Stricklands, our goal is to support the people, young and old, who come through that door. As long as hey keep coming in – we’ll be “All about the student”. Mr. V
